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Hi
Going to a Gala Dinner that I think was an Amex Plat event this week.
Never been to one before and the final email from Amex states “dress code smart/formal, not black tie”
Is this a work suit / shirt and tie and a dress for my wife or something else?
Lived in a suit for 30 years when I was working so generally opt not to wear one and would be miffed if I turn up and I’m an exception as happened a few years ago at Wembley corporate hospitality where I made my whole family comply with the dress code and we were literally the only ones!
The ‘London rule’ these days is that you can go one step below what is requested without any blow back – so black tie means suit is fine, suit means shirt and chinos is fine etc.
I’d be ‘shirt / blazer / chinos or smart jeans’ if that was my invite, and indeed is what I’ll wear to the RA summer party next week.
All I’d say is that you need to factor in guest age as well. Anything aimed at the over 60s means that you should probably go up a level and certainly not drop, so nothing less than a suit. I doubt this is an over 60s event though. If it was aimed at the under 30s then I would happily turn in (fresh) trainers with no concerns.
There are other nuances though – if this is a gala dinner to, for example, celebrate the life of a great humanitarian / bringer of peace / religious leader etc then I’d be more incline to wear a suit. If its just a posh booze up then dont stress it.
Thanks Rob. It’s the Dear England event at The Lowry in Manchester so a play about football with a gala dinner, up north, will hopefully mean I can get away with chinos shirt and jacket
That’s an interesting take, @Rob. I suspect things vary from one industry and city to another.
The last black tie even that I attended was a charity fundraiser in the Emirates Stadium. One person out of maybe 500 attendees wore a business suit due to a packing error. I knew him, and, this being Manchester, he was ribbed mercilessly all evening.
I will be in a finance conference with about 3,000 delegates in about a week. Less than 5% will be in chinos, although a few will be in trainers, as the event is very punishing on the feet. Only a handful will wear ties.
I think that finance people tend to stick to the rules more than creative types. And regional people tend to stick to the rules more than Londoners. I tend to regard a failure to comply with the requested dress code as rudeness at best and arrogance at worst. I wouldn’t want to be regarded as either rude or arrogant.
My perception of this, as a regular attendee at all sorts of invitation only lunchtime or evening events in London and around the country is that the tide of over informality has rather receded and that many are now choosing to dress more smartly and respect the host’s dress code. This is not only out of respect for the host but also particularly respect for ones spouse or partner not to look scruffy or too informal when they have made an effort to look smart.
Most private clubs around St James’s still require men to wear a suit and tie plus proper shoes. Many good golf clubs still require players to change for lunch. At the Queen’s Club tennis championships last year I would say more than half of the men wore a tie, so I shall wear one again this year.
Re the OP’s original question, if I were attending the Amex dinner, I would wear a suit and tie with the easy option of removing the tie if it appeared too formal on the night.
PS – I haven’t seen Dear England but my wife saw the original at the National Theatre (with Joseph Fiennes playing Gareth Southgate) and recently the ‘updated’ version and loved it on both occasions.
@JDB Surely your manservant knows where you are going in the evening, and lays out the appropriate attire?
@JDB Surely your manservant knows where you are going in the evening, and lays out the appropriate attire?
You mean, Valet… that role is no mere servant!
Stiff collars and cuffs used to be mandatory for men working in offices. Nobody feels the need to wear them to work now.
Styles change over time, not be edict, but by a few braves souls that dare to be different, momentum builds and eventually the rest of the sheep catch on to the new style and fall into line.
Wear what you’re comfortable in.
Stiff collars and cuffs used to be mandatory for men working in offices. Nobody feels the need to wear them to work now.
Styles change over time, not be edict, but by a few braves souls that dare to be different, momentum builds and eventually the rest of the sheep catch on to the new style and fall into line.
Wear what you’re comfortable in.
I wouldn’t disagree with the concept of wearing what one is comfortable in, but that ought to be weighed against respect for ones host, how ones partner is dressed and the nature of the event or the venue.
I have noticed how those looking to raise money (particularly tech related businesses) are now recognising that maybe they need to smarten their appearance maybe to look a bit more serious.
Our continental European friends do seem rather better than Brits about dressing appropriately smartly and restaurants and hoteliers definitely notice.
Styles absolutely change by edict. Business attire began to change when dress-down Friday edicts were given by employers. Suits disappeared when employers stopped requiring them, usually first for IT and back-office staff. If you’re asked (as a customer/guest) or told (as an employee) to dress in a certain way and you choose not to do that, you’re showing that you regard your right to self-expression as being more important than the request or instruction. That’s why people who fail to comply with dress codes are rude and arrogant.
As @JDB say, it’s absolutely true that, on average, you receive better service if you dress well. That’s especially true for more upmarket places. If you want attentive service, the best table in the restaurant, the just-arrived stock that’s not yet on the shelves, or simply to have your complaint dealt with in a positive way, it’s best to be appropriately dressed.
Styles absolutely change by edict.
No, they don’t. The HR director doesn’t arrive at work one day and decide on a whim “ties are no longer required, everyone start wearing polo shirts.”
The company policy gets changed to reflect changing trends. As more people, and more senior people, buck the old trend/policy for, say, ties, this gets noticed. More people start thinking “hmmmm..maybe ties aren’t essential any more”, momentum builds, across other companies in the industry, across industries, across countries even. Then the policy is changed to fall into line.
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