-
This was a trip that was originally planned for autumn 2020 with Qatar (AA Miles)/Collette Travel via Trailfinders and Virgin. Cancelled due to the pandemic, both AA, Virgin and Trailfinders refunded every penny and mile in a reasonable amount of time with no chasing.
Onward to 2024, now retired I have more time on my hands, Collette Travel have pulled out of the UK market and I spotted a similar trip on Luxury escapes wanting to use the Amex cashback. (Both Amex and TCB tracked and paid fine)
Amazingly the Qatar flights to JNB via DOH were still the same price (55 AA miles +£264) so I locked those in. Paid Luxury Escapes a reasonable amount for an 8 day JNB-Kruger-Zimbabwe (Victoria Falls)-Botswana (Chobe) package and wrapped 4 days in Jo’berg, and 2.5 weeks exploring Cape Town, garden route and Lesotho around it. I originally booked BA back from CPT in busines but then spotted 1st for only 10k more Avios from JNB, so I switched things around. In hindsight relying on BA on their knackered A380s may be a mistake but I’ll find out in a few weeks.
So outbound from MAN-DOH goes without a hitch, MAN is surprisingly pleasant for once, even security and the lounge. Arrived in Qatar, immigration fine but got stopped at the security x-ray because they assumed my bottle of water was alcohol, much sniffing involved but all fine. Then found that Uber will absolutely not work, no cars available. Got a taxi at the rank, paying around double what it would have been in an Uber. An hour later Uber worked perfectly
Embassy Suites in the old town was lovely, probably the cleanest and nicest one I’ve been to. Got the 10% back on Amex booking via expedia as I’m not really bothered about Hilton nights this year. Wandered around Doha at night, got some great pics and the next morning it was back to the airport.
Really smooth check in at the bus/1st desks and off to the Al Mourjan lounge in terminal C overlooking the garden. Lovely place to be, had a second breakfast and then off to the gate. Qatar decided to load all economy passengers onto the busses 1st and then bus class on their own bus. We went on a scenic tour of Hamad airport lasting at least 10 mins, arriving at the plane which was on a V gate on the other side of the apron and waited there for 20 mins. Suddenly we u-turned and went back to the gate. After a few mins told we’ll be setting off back to the plane in 2 mins. Then the door open again, will all business class pax please return to the lounge and we’ll contact you when something happens, so back to the Al Mourjan lounge for some more food. It was deserted at this time.
Anyway, 2.5 hour delay, and a gate change and we finally board. Turns out there was an engine failure on the original A359, they’d rustled up a replacement and unloaded/reloaded everything within 2 hours. We finally departed 3 hours late but arrived only about 2.20 later than planned.
JNB arrival and immigration was uneventful, so was the Gautrain ride into Jo’berg and I exited the station and crossed the road to the Radisson Blu Gautrain without being mugged, scammed or accosted in any way. (booked via rocketmiles for a nice tidy 7K United miles bonus before everyone became Radisson VIPs)
Basic hotel, reasonable breakfast, lots of roads closed around it due to a Red Bull Racing spectacular with David Coulthard in the main streets. I could hear the cars screaming past but couldn’t see anything as it was on the other side of the hotel but it was all done between 10am and 5pm and didn’t really affect anything I did. As noted on the daily chat, terrible glass window to the shower with an almost non-existent modesty panel, but a decent rain shower nonetheless. The only thing that really irritated me was that every time I switched the TV off it powered back on 5 mins later. I couldn’t be bothered calling down, so I managed to squeeze the plug out of the socket and left it dangling for them to sort out.
Whilst in JNB I saw nothing to indicate that it was any more dangerous and probably way safer than the UK. Wandered all over Sandton and Bramfontain. Went on a half day tour to Soweto, and used the Hop on Hop off Bus around Jo’berg and the Gautrain several timees. Walked up the street to the Nelson Mandela Mall for dinner every night and didn’t feel unsafe at all doing that. Found the most amazing family owned Greek restaurant called Papas on the Square, and ate there all 4 nights, working my way through the menu, bonding with the lovely staff (tip well, get attention ;)) and it was a great start to the trip.
Next day off to meet the rest of the tour group at the Intercontinental at JNB. Up to this point Luxury Escapes have been useless. Every question I asked took a week or more for a response was often confused and had to be clarified with their “ground team” on every occasion. When I had my final itinerary it had me listed as returning from Kasane rather than VFA which we’d supposedly sorted out way back in May. The other members of the group have had similar issues, names spelt wrongly, names and rooms mixed up with other couples. On arrival at the lodge my room was mixed with a couple, our names combined on the registration and 2 people in my room, 1 in theirs.
Anyway the Menzies rep who was supposed to escort us to check in finally turned up 30 mins late, had no idea who he was meeting in terms of numbers or names (he showed me his phone and only had 3 parties names rather than 5 and had no clue there were 9 pax in total). We eventually sorted things out ourselves by just chatting in the lobby, 6 aussies, 2 canadians and me).
Checked in, got to the gate, lined up and then told there’s a problem with the plane please sit down again. Finally took off on a nice Embraer Airlink jet about 90 mins late. Hoedspruit airport was a little chaotic but once in the minivan we’re told 3 hours to the Imbali Safari Lodge. Luxury Escapes had said 2 hours, and that it wasn’t in Kruger, it was in Greater Kruger (which was rubbish, it’s firmly in Kruger). We had no idea what game drives etc were included or anything about the lodge stay
Finally arrived at the lodge with our driver in a mad panic as he had to get back to the Kruger gate before 6pm otherwise he’d be locked in. Very little chance he made it but we have no idea.
Anyway, checked in at 3.55 pm to be told there’s a game drive leaving now if anyone wants. Everyone dumps bags, grabs cameras and we’re off.
Within an hour we’re seeing Elephants, Giraffes, Zebra, Impala, and then our tracker gets a call, Lion spotted so we’re off at a pace. Within 30 seconds canadian girl drops her phone and it bounces out of the land cruiser. We’re about 300m down the track before the vehicle stops. Guide looks everywhere, and then we turn around drive back up and there’s the phone undamaged in the middle of the road.
Off to the Lion and there it was, just chilling out. So a pretty good start for our first hour.
Game drives at the Imabali are daily morning and evening depending on the season from 5.30am to 9am, then 4pm to 7pm in the summer months. (I hate mornings, especially 4 in a row getting up at 4.45) There are only 12 suites here, I don’t really do luxury hotels so I don’t have anything to compare to, but this is very nice. Both the shower and claw foot bath have windows open to the (currently) dry river bed. Yesterday a monkey watched me shower and elephants wandered past on the opposite bank, and impala came to my deck. The decks have loungers and a plunge pool. The restaurant/breakfast area looks out on to a man made watering hole on the opposite bank and the grey water from the lodge is pumped up there.
Since we arrived there have been plenty of elephants and impala, hyenas, and this morning a white Rhino. Second drive we see a young leopard at a day old kill. We’re pretty much in heaven now.
The tracker/guide had been telling us for 2 days that we’re unlikely to see a rhino as there are only 2 males in the 10,000 hectare private concession and they’ve not been spotted for 2 months. There’s 10 land cruisers across the 3 properties in this concession and they’re out for 7+ hours a day with groups. We stick with the same tracker throughout, a young girl called Janine. She’s a very safe and competent driver and hugely knowledgeable.
4.45am the phone rings (our wake up call was supposed to be 5am). Rhino at the water hole she says, and then hangs up to call all the other rooms. She’d literally walked in the door at 4.44 and one of the restaurant staff said btw there’s a rhino across there. She was almost beside herself with excitement. So I dashed over there (even though we’re not supposed to walk the paths in the dark without an escort as the property is unfenced), there’s nobody around. With my crappy eyesight I though it looked like an elephant but as the sun started to rise a couple of minutes later I could see it more clearly and my camera could see much better than I could. Most of the group just thought it was a windup so didn’t bother and a couple of mins later it wandered off and none of the 9 other trackers/groups have been able to find it since then.
Here’s some pics from the time at and around Imbali. https://imgbox.com/g/dWZ2LwRIn2
And here’s this morning’s elephant procession as viewed from my deck. https://sendvid.com/9onrrdgd
I’ll add more to this over the next 3 weeks.
Love the vultures.
Following with interest Dave … have done some great safaris in India and Africa is on the list for the next family adventure (summer 2026 is the hope!). Keep the posts and pics coming!
Great trip report, brings back memories of my safari, you can’t beat being up close and personal! I’ve only been back 3 weeks but I would return in a heartbeat. Looking forward to your follow up reports, to give me some ideas of places to visit in future.
Thanks, great read and enjoyed the pictures. Enjoy the rest of your trip.
Thanks for your comments all, here’s part 2
Kruger pics updated – https://imgbox.com/g/x8ShPupKGZ
After a 3.5 hour part game drive, part road journey via the Kruger Orpen gate, stopping to change vehicles, buy souveniers and toilet we arrived at Kruger International Airport. Definitely one of the pretitiest small airports that I’ve seen and our short 40 min hop to Victoria Falls airport on Fastjet was uneventful. Apparently they are the Ryanair of the region but you’d never know it, not a scratchcard in sight. Actually having flown Airlink and Fastjet I have to say that many many other airlines could learn from them. Apart from the 90 min delay on JNB-HDS due to an engine/safety issue the 3 internal flights have been perfect in terms of process/boarding/safety/service and passenger behaviour.
Immigration was swift, the required double entry visa for Brits was $70, US bills no cards. The Aussies only paid $50 but they could pay in Euro, USD, Rand or use cards. The Canadian couple got screwed over, $150 for a single entry and they had to pay the same again a few days later as they’re banned from buying a double entry. Apparently reciprocal relations between Zim and CA aren’t good.
Once on the minibus we arrived at the Pioneers Victoria Falls which was nice but not a patch on the Imbali. Luxury Escapes noted this as breakfast included only and everything else was expensive in USD. Think 70% of US prices which was a shock after coming from South Africa. Next morning we had a walking tour of the falls, not the best views as it was the dry season but worth the walk, and the views of the gorge. I didn’t think it was a patch on Iguazu and Niagara, but it was just the wrong time of year.
Great thing about the first two hotels was unlimited filtered water whenever you wanted it, more of which later.
I decided to walk into Victoria Falls town after being assured that it was completely safe. So as mad dogs and Englishmen are wont to do, I strolled into town in 35C heat through the side and main roads (about 1.5 miles). Nobody gave me a first look never mind a second, not even the baboons wandering the streets. As I got to the shopping areas I was approached by a guy selling billon and half billion dollar notes as that’s the big thing that they try and flog to the tourists after their years of hyper inflation and repeated currency collapses. After fobbing him off I headed to the local brewery/pub for a much needed beer. Made with water from the Zambezi river I was lookiing forward to that and some food.
Seated immediately in an almost empty pub it went downhill from there on. Waitress didn’t bring a menu until I asked. then a party of 10 Italians came in, she immediately started handing out menus and taking orders, completely ignoring me. After 15 mins I managed to grab her attention and order beer and food. 10 mins later after she’d served three other tables who had come in after me she brought the beer. I asked her for a wifi code and she said she’d bring one. 15 mins later I asked her colleague for a wifi code and she muttered something unintelligible and walked off. After an hour of waiting I plunked $6 for the beer on the table and walked out. That’s only the second time I’ve done that in 3 decades of travelling and working around the UK and the world. So if you go to VF, avoid River Brewing, service is shocking and their beer is rubbish.
Still starving I walked back up the main road and headed to Nandos. Not like the UK in terms of service, just walk in and grab your own seat but the ordering at the counter was the same, menu was a little odd, no alcohol, but the chicken liver starters and the half chicken and chips and water for under a tenner was great apart from the chips being undercooked.
Evening was an included river cruise which was ok, none of us were particularly inspired by it but we got our first view of Chobe’s hippos and some lovely elephant action where they were entering the water and preparing to swim across the river
Next morning we’re back in a minibus to the Botswana border. Crossing was just wierd. They’re trying to protect against both Mpox and Foot and Mouth. First we had to fill in a paper health declaration form, have our temperatures taken, and hands squirted with sanitiser. Then back on the bus to travel about 100 yards to the disinfection station where you had to dunk ALL your shoes inc ones from your luggage, flip flops etc, in a bucket of dirty chemical. The guy who ‘helped’ didn’t really bother and one flip flop didn’t even enter the gunge tank so it’s your typical pointless beaurocracy paying lip service to an issue. Then it’s back on the bus for another few hundred feet and off again for a passport stamp.
Once in Botswana it was only 15 mins drive to the Cresta Mowana lodge, just outside Kasane town, within 10 mins drive of Chobe National Park. First impressions of the Cresta Mowana were poor and it went downhill from there on as 2 of the 5 rooms weren’t ready inc mine. Minutes after getting to my room, knock at the door and there’s a maintenance guy come to repair the safe as housekeeping had reported it. He fiddled around for 15 mins, said he’d come back with fresh batteries. 3 hours later after a couple of vists he gives up and says it’ll likely need to be drilled out of the wall and that’s the last I hear of it during my 2 night stay.
5am next day the promised the wake up call never happened, no hot water in the shower, but I’m up for the game drive at 5.30. Well none of us were prepared for Chobe. If we’d been amazed by the fauna we’d seen in Kruger, Chobe just smacked us in the face with the quantity of animals and also how close we got to them. In the first hour we’d seen 4 of the big 5. The Rhino that used to live there have been moved to a fenced park halfway across the country to stop poachers. Chobe is completely unfenced and the animals can and do roam across 5 countries and their tagged elephants have been seen wandering 500 miles to Angola at times.
Evening river cruise was nice but we all said given the choice in the afternoon we wanted another game drive. Not wanting to get our hopes up and expecting it to be more of the same it just smacked us in the face again. more than a hundred elephants and giraffes, lionesses that wandered 2 feet from the land cruiser, scaring one lady so much she stopped taking photos of it. It’s been really fun that as a group that we’ve shared photos in the evening, so if one person missed the leopard, someone else passed the pic on etc.
6 hours of game drives in Chobe smacks Kruger into nothing but it’ll always hold a special memory for the Imbali lodge, the service, staff, food quality and the watering hole, our rhino, leopard and all the firsts that we saw, of zebra, giraffe, elephant, hyena, etc. We even saw Antelope which are so rare in this area that the driver/trackers were lined up taking photos of them.
Back to the Cresta Mowana and all the food is buffet style. ok quality but you’re basically shoved out of the way constantly when trying to reach for something with Chinese and German parties owning 90% of the tables. Polite English, Canadian and Aussies don’t get a look in. However there was a surprising amount of choice on the buffet including Impala, and Kudu which we’d seen thousands of over the previous few days. Breakfast was a a fun experience – You’ve all seen the commercial toasters where there’s a knob to mechanically lift and drop the bread and then turn a timer knob to start the heat – Well this one had no knob. You had to force the prongs of a fork onto the sticky out bar and rotate that to start the timer. Day one, of the staff did it for me, by day 2 I was an expert and they laughed as I did it with ease.
Water – Really, at what is supposed to be a 4/5* resort in 35C heat, drinking water should be flowing freely. Here, each guest is given 0.5L of purified water that tasted of soap per day. Anything else was £1.4 per additional bottle, no choice of anthing that didn’t taste terrible. (I’m a bit of a water connoisseur) The room had no sockets near the bed, only a USB one hacked into the frame of the bed, sockets were by the desk in the far corner of the room. Everything was tired, my room door was half broken and bits came away when I opened it, the screen door was broken. Room stealables were 4 hangers, and a pack of 4 condoms, yes you read that correctly. Maybe they are Mpox protection.
So the last day of the group tour, I enjoyed the company of 4 lovely couples ranging from 20s to 80s and we all bonded like nothing I’ve ever really experienced before. In the space of 7 days, great humour, piss taking, in jokes, and some great story telling.
Quick 70 min ride back across the border to VFA, the Canadians get fleeced again for their $150 visa even though they’re going straight to the airport to depart and will only be in the country for 3 hours. A final coffee together before boarding and then at the gate I get an op-up to business class. Total surprise and the first time in over 250 flights that it’s happpened to me, so I’m writing this from a comfortable 1-2 seat layout, big leather seat with tons of legroom, massive width, Embraer jet. Thank you Airlink, it makes the 730 USD I paid for an economy seat (as all the lower fare buckets had sold out) almost worth it.
Airlink are the most safety focussed of any airline that I’ve flown in terms of electronic equipment. ALL headphones/ear buds must be out of your ears during the whole taxi, take off and landing process. They will be in your face until you do, and if you put them back in you’ll be told off. Airpods and phones must be powered off, not just in airplane mode. I don’t remember this on any Embraer jet I’ve flown so I guess it’s just an Airlink policy.
One thing I’ll say after 8 game drives is that if you have a weak bladder game drives are not for you. There’s no getting off to go to the loo. Gents may get one chance to go behind a bush, ladies…well that’s up to you if you fancy it. And also anything with limited flexibility may find it hard to get into and out of the 10 person land cruise style vehicles.
Next stop Cape town and on to the Garden Route
2 days in Chobe – https://imgbox.com/g/GVxZAElnUI
Doha – https://imgbox.com/g/7KJerBxYrC
Jo’berg and Soweto (the good and bad) – https://imgbox.com/g/abnhydMhyeSo I left part two quite literally up in the air. Landed in Cape Town and hugged the companions from the tour goodbye for the final time.
Luggage was one of the first off, headed for Parkade 1 to pick up my Uber, (looked a lot like MAN T1 pickup area to be honest). I’d typed 16 Bree Street in to the Uber app not even considering there would be two Bree Streets and when my Uber began to drive towards the northern suburbs I got a bit concerned. Finally managed to persuade the app I wanted the one in the centre of Cape Town, the driver managed to get me on the right route and only lost 15 mins in the traffic and hundred rand or so.
16 on Bree is a monster (for CT) modern 32 storey building in the middle of the city. It’s virtualy all AirBnB rentals. Security is really tight, once you’ve signed in facial recognition gets you in and out of the building, and for the car park (which is the first 10 floors) it’s fingerprint recogition.
First couple of days in CT I rode the hop on hop off red bus, did the inner loop and queued for over two hours for the cable car for table mountain. Go 1st thing or after lunch, 11am is really not the time to do it. The cafe-bar at the top is reasonably priced and I think it was something like 3 quid for a Mojito that was so lovingly made I nearly wanted to hug her. Even crushed the ice by hand. Took something like 3-4 minutes to do it and by the time she was done I could feel the daggers in my back from everyone behind that just wanted cans of coke and bottles of beer. One thing to note about the cable car which they don’t tell you until you’re on it is that the wndows are open and the floor revolves whilst it ascends so that everyone gets their fair share of the views. I’d never seen that before and it’s really unnerving.
2nd day the red bus again on the outer loop to visit Kirstenboch Botanical Garden and then a last minute decision to take the offshoot bus which diverts to Groot Constancia, the oldest winery in South Africa for my 1st tasting session and a souvenier wine glas which I’m hoping makes it home in one piece.
Went to a greek restaurant in the V&A for dinner and a few hours later felt quite ill with the shakes and a bad stomach. Not blaming the restaurant but by 10am the following morning I was fine. Did a couple of walking tours the next day with copious amounts of coffee in between.
Popped into Avis to ask if they could pre-prepare the letter of authority to allow me to drive into Lesotho for the following day and they assured me there was no need.
9.30 am turned up at Avis, waited in the queue for 15 mins as there was nobody handling preferred customers. When I finally got to the desk and asked for the letter of authority the poor girl had no idea what to do. She asked several colleagues, went to the back office, went upstairs for a bit and finally came back with a pad containg 3 part carbons. She messed up the first two, tried tipexing out her mistake and then released tipex wouldn’t work on the copies beneath. When she finally got it almost right I said that’s fine as it it, and left with my car – 55 mins after arrival.
Rushed back to the apartment block to find my fingerprint would not register…. Honestly wtf is wrong with my fingers. After being told to use moisturiser by US immigration I’m starting to get a complex about them.
Final and only words on the apartment – This one was pretty disgusting. mould in the shower and the balcony had almost completely decomposed fag ends, and food scraps on the table. Looked like it hadn’t been cleaned in over a year. The rest of the apartment was actually clean and nice.
Drove out of CT without incident, headed up Chapmans Peak Drive (toll road, no foreign credit cards accepted, so take R64 cash) which didn’t live up to the hype although the engineering feat is phenomenal. Boulders beach penguins were next, saw plenty, very crowded with tourists as expected and the baby ones were cute.
Simon’s Town Guesthouse was next. Can’t say enough good things about it, apart from the mad steep hills you have to drive up and park on. I had one of the best rooms facing the ocean and could have just sat there for days watching the world go by. Suddenly an Orca zooms past, breaching on to its back at least 6 times before it was out of view. Gutted that I didn’t have my camera ready as that was the only whale activity I saw whilst I was there.
Next morning was up early to beat the crowds at the Cape of Good Hope, funicular to the top, hiked around a bit, hiked back down to the car and was back in my room resting by lunchtime and hoping for whales that never came.
Day 18 – Stelmus minaiture toy museum, Vred en lust winery for lunch and really felt sorry for them as the roadworks that have been going on for a long time and will be for the forseeable, are ruining trade for them and several others. Then on to the Franschhoek Motor Museum. Never been to a museum where you have to reserve a slot in advance, then have your car regsitration disc and driving license scanned before you can drive onto the property. The driveway is nearly 1km long and the gardens around it are as impressive as the cars.
Next day was the wine tram. Managed to cram in La Bri, Holden Manz (best scenery), Mr Branson’s Mont Rochelle (aparently he hasn’t visited in over 2 years) the food there was excellent and the wine too of course. Rickety Bridge and Franschhoek Cellar (worst of the lot, the online reviews are true about the service).
I mentioned on the daily thread that I was unhappy with several things at the Protea Franschhoek but I’m not going to repeat that, I’ll just say that in all the hundreds of hotels I’ve been to I’ve never seen one fail to put out anything apart from tea/coffee/juice and bread (and not even a plate to put that bread on) when there are guests who have paid for breakfast, no matter how few in number.
Day 20 Betty’s Bay penguin colony is a shadow of what it was apparently. There were so few that you could count them. Apparently their food supply has dried up so they’ve largly moved on. Fewer tourists made it a more pleasant experience but I didn’t even bother taking a photo.
Tried to hike the Oudebosch Trail but what the blogs don’t tell you is that it’s strictly a one way hike. You have to have someone pick you up at the Harold Porter Botanical Garden around 10km away by road, so ended up on the river trail instead which was pretty stunning.Ended up at the Milkwood Lodge in Hermanaus, another wonderful guest house with a charming owner with whom I spent a good few hours nattering.
From this point on I seem to have spent far too much time in roadworks, they’re everywhere and each one takes 20-30 mins to get through. I missed load of things I’d planned, one day a 3 hour plan turned into 4.5 hours. The next 10 mins turned into 45.
Cape Agulhas, the southern most point of africa was fun for 10 mins, the “A Riverbed Guesthouse” in Swellendam was just gorgeous, and I could have happily spent a week there by the pool.
I managed to hike to Wolwedans Dam, which is damn tricky !! I got misled by the directions and then went past the hidden turning and ended up at a dead end. When I walked back I bumped into two locals who were drying their feet. Turned out they were doing trail maintenance and pointed me in the direction of the river crossing. Turns out you need to strip off shoes and socks, and wade through 3 parts of the river up to shin height in the water to get to the next part of the trail. None of the blogs I read mentioned that.
More roadworks, more missed plans due to opening hours, and rocked up at the Protea George which was virtually deserted. Greeted as a gold member, with a small can of diet pepsi (no choices) as a welcome gift. In the room was a fruit basket with a handful of ferrero rocher scattered in it. As I mentioned on the daily chat, the room/patio was on the fairway of the golf course (so lots of shouty golfers) and even though recently refurbished the furniture was trashed. See below https://imgbox.com/8CxH8Gv6
https://imgbox.com/ECVs3NiR5.45am the leaf blowers started on the fairway, 6am the lawn mowers for the next hour, then housekeeping with their shouting at 6.30.
Next day they courteously didn’t start with the leaf blowers until 6.15am as it was a Sunday! But within minutes the weather broke for the first time on my trip and we had 2 hours of torrential rain (on the tin roofed cabins) so that put paid to them but was deafening in itself.Having a fondness for transport museums and old railways I’d booked on something called the Powervan at Outeniqua. Hmmm… Basically a diesel powered ex-works truck on the rails that takes you there and back to see how far it is up the mountain 🙂 All the other passengers were mothers, kids under 10 and all spoke Afrikaans and were very very loud. The poor guide had to do everything in English because of me the lone tourist. Don’t get me wrong it’s a heck of a feat of engineering from the 1800s and used to run steam locos but I did feel a little out of place as all the kids screamed whooooooooooo in every tunnel and at the picnic location one of the mums decided she’d take pity on me and offer coffee and rusks – I just wanted some peace and quiet for 10 mins in the shade, away from the little darlings.
Anyway that’s enough rambling for this section, tomorrow is the beginning of the last week, the idea of which is really making me sad.
Great and very detailed trip reports @davefl I loved reading them, we had a few lodges in Kenya and Uganda that were disappointing, but the others were excellent, just a shame that your not in the good ones for longer, one or two nights, but basically only in them for food and sleep.
You have certainly packed a lot into this trip, it must have been quite time consuming dealing with the itinerary.
Sadly all trips have to come to an end, but there’s always the next one around the corner, stay safe, looking forward to the report of the last weeks shenanigans 😎
Thanks @Gordon, I’ve never written anything like this before so happy that people enjoy my rambling and complaining.
Planning this was nothing compared to my USA trips, some of which took over 250 hours of research and planning/booking.
@davefl I am enjoying your reports too. I take it you are a solo traveller? I admire you doing these trips – you do move around a lot. Why do you not stay longer in fewer places? I could’ve told you about getting to Table Mountain early and the fact that the cable car has open windows and revolves. My mum used to work for the company that supplied the wire cables between the cable stations. They also supply many of the wire cables in the gold mines. It used to be possible to walk down from the top of Table Mountain, never done that though. Also glad you went to Groot Constantia – it’s beautiful. The wine is good too. Hope the wine glass survives the trip. I stayed with a friend’s parents who live in a house opposite the entrance to the wine estate. That was 20 years ago now though. Where are you going for your last week?
@AJA thanks, yes primarily solo traveller, occasionally will do a group tour with one traveller or travelsphere etc. watched my parents travel for years, now I’m making up for lost time so blaming them for having the bug 🙂 I don’t stay longer because there’s too much in the world I want to see
I had intended to get to the cableway for 9.30 but I couldn’t get my lazy ass out of bed, then missed one of the hoho buses, and it was after 11am by the time I got there. Interesting about the cables
Rest of the trip will be revealed in the final post 😉
So we pick up on my last night in George. I decided to forage locally for food and ended up at the Rendevous restaurant at the Outeniqua bowls club. If you can find this you’ve done well. Even with Google Maps it’s a bizarre place to find. Great reviews but not even a sign on the building. If you’re not a local you’ve not much of a chance of stumbling on it. Steaks and service were great, the random conversation with a young SA man who was about to leave for Devon to join His Majesty’s Navy to be a marine was somewhat of a surprise.
His pronunciation of “Devon” as “Dayvown” was the most amusing part.
Next morning it was a drive to the start of the Montagu Pass (road is currently closed) but the old Toll House is accessible and it is a lovely experience. The cost of your tip gets you pancakes and coffee for breakfast if you’re in the mood but otherwise it’s an interesting place to look around and the stories/history told by the guide are worth the excursion up the mountain.
Today was a driving and hiking day. The Big Tree loop was surprisingly quiet on a Sunday morning (I was the only one there but I discovered a couple of days later that there’s an identically named Big Tree Loop near Tsitsikamma which is more popular). I stopped off at an antiques/curio place called Smokkelhuis which was supposed to be open until 1pm on a Sunday but as is the way was closed when I arrived (memories of USA trips here). The Garden of Eden loop trail was drizzly and boring, and with the noise from passing traffic reminded me of my local trails in Manchester at the side of the M60 – pointless and loud. On to Robberg Nature Reserve hike where I spent an interesting couple of hours hiking the Witsand trail until the rain started to come down (for the 1st time on the trip)
Tonight’s stop in Pletttenberg bay was the Lala Panzi guest house where the host insists you join him for beer/wine when you arrive and regales you with stories of his mining career in over 100 countries. A lovely place to spend an evening. Local food is Barrington’s pub where a great deal of the produce is grown in their garden and the beer is produced on site.
Next day off on a Segway tour of Tsitsikamma national park. I love any opportunity to ride a Segway howver this one was pretty boring compared to ones I’ve done in the past being just a couple of forest trails with no views but just being on one and riding around makes me happy. For a beginner it’s a great intro to the machines with no hazards to avoid. It was supposed to rain all day so we went out kitted in full wet gear but only a few spots were felt. Tsitsikamma can get 0.5-1M of rain per year, so expect to get wet. It’s also the only Segway tour that’s required me to wear a hairnet for hygene purposes to protect the helmet and also a hi viz jacket.
Final stop for the day was the famous Storms River Mouth rope bridges. I’d seen pics, didn’t realise how packed it would be with coach parties but I managed to cross not only the bridges but hike to the top of the viewpoint which only a very small percentage of all visitors get to. It’s not a crazy hike but it’s steep and most visitors just go to the bridge and return on their coach. The weather was gorgeous and the promised rain vanished.
On exiting the national park I had to open the boot of the car which was searched to make sure I’d not attempted to steal a monkey or baboon!
Lodging for the night was the Tsitsikamma Village Inn which I’d booked last minute. I thought it was a tiny place but turned out it was huge, built in 1888 when the first N2 road had cut through the region. Old Colonial style, enhanced over the next century and restored to rather interesting condition. I’ll ignore the paper thin walls you could almost see through never mind hear people breathe in the bathroom next door but the HFP folks wil be interested to know that whilst there are no stealable hangers, there was a cafetiere with a jar of ground coffee and wierdly a decanter with what I assume was whisky and 2 shot glasses. The experience was pretty much spoiled by 2 coach parties and a dick who thought it was fine to fly his incredibly noisy drone all over the grounds at head height. The restaurant and pub were completely booked out with the coach parties so I ended up eating at “Marilyn’s Diner” next door which is an Elvis/Marilyn Monroe themed 1950s diner, seemingly out of place in that location but the food was typically american and huge portions.
At this point I felt I was done with the trip with 6 days to go. I’d originally booked 2 nights at Ado Elephant National Park in a cottage but after seeing hundreds of elephants in Kruger and Chobe I felt it was pointless to do that so changed things on the fly and booked the above in Tsitsikamma and another night in Port Elizabeth instead. I won’t name the accomodation in PE as even though my hosts were delightful, I really didn’t like the place – It felt like a posh prison cell with no privacy. The hosts are retiring shortly so would be unfair to reference them. 3 nights there and I barely left my bed. Just felt really despondent at this point.
When I departed Port Elizabeth I had 20 hours of driving ahead of me over the next 4 days and I wasn’t looking forward to it or expecting much, but how wrong I was. The 5 hours to at guesthouse named Rhoom at Burgersdorp was a fantastic drive. I was dubious abut the accomodation but after meeting the young woman who owned it my spirits completly changed. She’s absolutely inspirational. SA born, educated in London, lived in Saudi and a couple of countries, went home to SA with a mission to create jobs for the locals. Bought an old bunk house, renovated and paid it off in 3 years, then started a farm and is planting 20,000 garlic bulbs this year, next plan is to build a 32 cottage retirement home on the bunk house land. Just one of those people you look at and say wow!
With renewed vigor I was off to the Kingdom of Lesotho having no idea what to expect as there is almost no recent information available on the internet about this small country apart from some “world’s most dangerous roads, Sani Pass blogs and there was no way I was going to tackle that on my own in a crappy Suzuki saloon, it’s very much 4×4 territory for the experienced driver.
Nothing could have prepared me for that day. After 2.5 hours of quiet and scenic SA roads I arrived at the Tele Bridge border crossing. I played the dumb tourist and crossed with no issues in a matter of minutes. Within half a mile I nearly got wiped out by a taxi cutting through a bend on the wrong side of the road just like my experiences in Bosnia & Montenegro. So with defensive driving mode engaged I carried on for the next 3 hours.
I can only describe it as driving through Arizona, Colorado, Iceland, Bosnia and a smattering of Wales and Scotland all in the space of an afernoon. Jaw dropping scenery, and possibly the best driving roads of my life. Did I mention you need to avoid people… lots of them all over the road, plus cows, horses, goats, sheep, donkeys, rock falls and more as you plough on bend after bend, view after view through spectacular mountain scenery. Lesotho I love you.
After driving on the perfectly paved A4 and A5 for 3 hours I finally arrived exhausted at the village of Semonkong. Turning off the tarmac I was faced with what was basically a donkey track for nearly 2 miles through a village with hundreds of people going about their daily business, car bouncing left and right over sharp rocks and swerving around human and animal obstacles to get to my destination. 1st gear or mostly coasting downhill to the Semonkong Lodge and checked in to what is probably the most luxurious accomodation within 200 miles in any direction.
The views are beautiful, the food reasonable considering the location but then the power goes out at 8pm and doesn’t come back until after 8am the following morning. “Included Breakfast” was limited to steamed bread and instant coffee as a result. At dinner they ask if you would like the fire lit in your room before you retire to bed, I declined as it was around 23C.
To put this in context, Lesotho is (as of 2023) a country of 2.1M people, only 35% have electricity, 20% have Aids and the life expectancy is 55 years of age – but they have 1.1M mobile phones. Poverty is even more obvious than SA. Countless scenes of woman beating clothes on rocks by the river, donkeys and oxen carrying loads, cattle rounded up with sticks and horses. But as it’s a christian festival day everyone seems to be out in their best clothes and hats to celebrate. It was quite a spectacle.
Next day I leave the lodge to visit Maletsunyane Falls. So along the tarmaced A5 I go, until the turn off for the falls. Here it gets sketchy. Am I on the right road, is this even a road I ask myself at times. Well after about 25 mins of “world’s most dangerous roads” I end up at a barrier, and what looked like a closed kiosk. I get out of the car, the door is nearly ripped off its hinges by the 50mph winds. After a few seconds a 6 inch x 6 inch window opens and this guy asks if i’m there to visit the falls…..ummm yeah why else would I have nearly died getting there… after trying to communicate over the noise of the wind he swipes my credit card and opens the barrier. Driving on another 1.5km I arrive at a vision of modernity – A massive brand new (unfinished) museum, visitor centre, conference centre and restaurant that has taken several years to build. Barely able to stand up because of the wind I take some snaps of the falls, wander around the closed and unfinished complex (totally alone) and drive back down this “road aka goat track” wondering surely it would have been better to build the road before the complex, not as I was told… maybe in 2 years time the road will be built. I’ve no idea how they got all the trucks and people up there to build the complex.
I also have no idea how the Suzuki survived these two days with all four tyres intact, it just felt like they would pop at any second on the roads to Semonkong and Maletsunyane.
Another wonderfully scenic drive ensues and I get to Bloemfontain and the Tredenham Boutique Hotel. I was exhausted by this point, so all I can say is that this was a superb place to relax. Ended up paying £16 for a 12pm checkout after watching a herd of Springbok graze on the lawn at breakfast.
My final day is a 4 hour drive back to OR Tambo airport but having navigated 3 dust storms due to mining/quarrying and ploughing, all is well after nearly 1750 miles since I left Cape Town. Then 5 miles from ORT, rush hour traffic slams on to avoid a broken down truck, the muppet that has been tailgating me realises he cant stop, swerves to left, I saw him do it in my rear view mirrir so I swerve right across the white line and onto the grass verge and he finishes up level with my rear quarter panel…. f*ckk…. Needless to say he wasn’t tailgating any more as we moved off. I’m pretty sure clean trousers would have been required.
I tried to head for the Engen Skystop to fill up as mentioned on Hfp but missed the turning, ended up in the car park and had to queue for 10 mins to get out. Finally filling up after a go-around and drop the car at Avis. We’ll see what speeding fines and tolls they add to my bill over the next few weeks. It’s almost impossible to avoid the toll charges as even if you try and pay cash they tell you you’ve already been charged because of your toll disc which can’t be covered up like the ones in the USA.
On to my first flight on an A380 and in F, delightful crew, on time departure, everything works and isn’t tatty as I expected. Completely baffled why BA aren’t serving SA wine on a JNB departure but I’m not complaining as I’ve just finished my second bottle of 2011 Pomerol. Food was average by any standard but at least edible unlike Virgin’s recent UC offerings.
And there we have it, without a doubt the most amazing, packed, interesting and varied trip I’ve ever been on. Lesotho was country number 56. The only negatives in SA were the absolutely psychotic driving of the pickup trucks and Audi saloons but that’s common to almost every country in which I’ve driven. When you see a pickup overtake you. the three cars in front and a tanker by driving down the opposite carriageway in roadworks/contraflow where it’s clearly posted no overtaking, at 150 kph where the limit is 80kph you just despair of human kind. The other thing that really annoyed me were the “car guards”. These are guys that put on a dirty hi viz vest and expect you to tip them because they’ve waved you into a perfectly visible open parking space, or “looked after” your car whilst you’ve spent 2 mins in a supermarket.
P.S. After a couple of hours in a virtually empty Concorde lounge at LHR which is typically a nice place to be I boarded my final flight to MAN which arrived on stand 10 mins early. Welcome to Manchester, where it was grey, cold, and the jet bridge won’t attach to the aircraft. After 10 mins of messing around and another 10 mins waiting for the Menzies ground staff to find some steps we finally disembarked 10 mins late into the ground floor departure area (mixing with outgoing passengers) and with no supervision and being allowed to wander until someone spotted an exit door. Entering the baggage hall the carousel was already moving and the exit flap had been blocked by two suitcases which were hanging over the side, so every piece of baggage was slamming up against them and falling off the belt. Managed to grab mine before it smashed into the others and headed out for the half mile walk to the T3 pickup area for my Uber (MAN management – you’re a joke. Putting the pickup area where it is and expecting passengers to walk mostly uncovered and then stand in the rain is just absurd) – M60 was even more of a car park than usual at 9.30am due to multiple accidents at J18 so my ride was 30 mins longer and £10 more than expected.
What a typical welcome home.
Thanks for reading, and thanks to those who said they enjoyed my rambling 🙂
All galleries updated and more added to the ealier ones and moved to google because Imagebox was too slow. One final note on the galleries, I don’t tend to take pics of people directly or the poverty as it feels wrong. I wish I could just blink my eyes and record what I saw as I drove along as there’s a lot more than the pics below show.
Doha https://photos.app.goo.gl/kXshTKuM8CpMzivz7
Johannesburg https://photos.app.goo.gl/vkSpT8eR5pZoqZ9G7
Kruger https://photos.app.goo.gl/8YeX8YXcdNmMThvU9
Victoria Falls https://photos.app.goo.gl/Edkt9QYGYWQ57RQh7
Chobe https://photos.app.goo.gl/qU2MMaw8gtHZi4gLA
Cape Town and surrounds https://photos.app.goo.gl/9yH6yKCTDGBvXigt7
Garden Route https://photos.app.goo.gl/c1XrtSk5EqoyqEaD9
Lesotho https://photos.app.goo.gl/PhSREuxJmY51Xry9A@AJA Forget to say, yes the Groot Constancia wine glass survived intact. I used the box from the Holden Manz wine 🙂
Enjoyed the trip with you …I’m exhausted! Thanks for writing it up. We’ve been to SA twice, thoroughly enjoyed it. Second visit promoted by the 3 days in garden route being a total washout the first time, so went back !
Wow that was brave to do the Lesotho leg of the trip. I have never got to Lesotho but Eswatini (Swaziland as was) is interesting and also nearly as poor but also with stunning scenery. Am glad that you, the Suzuki and your wine glass survived. Glad you had a great flight back to the UK in F on the A380.
PS re this sentence about:
” “car guards”. These are guys that put on a dirty hi viz vest and expect you to tip them because they’ve waved you into a perfectly visible open parking space, or “looked after” your car whilst you’ve spent 2 mins in a supermarket.”Don’t be annoyed. Be grateful. The reason they exist is that 20 years ago car crime became endemic. You would never know if your car would have been broken into let alone still be there when you got back. Even after only 2 minutes.
A cottage industry arose where people would be “employed” to look after cars parked. They exist solely on the tips that drivers give them hence my loose reference to employed. At least they then look after the cars rather than breaking into them and in a country that had no minimum wage until 2019 or real unemployment benefits and practically zero public healthcare it provides an income.
By the way do they still have people “pumping gas” at petrol stations? It’s a while since I was last in SA but that was another form of employment.
@davefl – you had quite some journey, so it seems, that amount of traveling would be an impossible task for my wife,
That’s why she is staying at home for my next extended trip! our recent safari transfers were bad enough, but you have no choice if you want to see as much as possible, in a given time, and these countries are vast. Great trip report, and many happy memories though.Wow, what a trip. I’m considering a first safari but I’m not brave enough to wander too far from civilisation and/or toilets 😂
Thanks @davefl just now catching up on some reading. I found myself reading quicker and quicker as I went through it trying to keep pace with your travels.
Thanks for your comments everyone.
@AJA Lesotho A roads are fine since they were all tarmaced a few years ago but once you leave those, you’re on your own. I really wish I’d have stopped and taken more photos.Was absolutely shocked to discover that insurance for car drivers is completely optional in SA. Not even 3rd party cover is required and I appreciate that car guards might have been required 20 years ago but really not any more. I didn’t like the aggressive nature of someone standing in front of my front bumper so I couldn’t drive away when just parked on a street in a small town.
And yes, attended filling stations are still a thing both in SA and Lesotho. Don’t mind tipping them 10 rand as they’ve actually performed a service, washed your windscreen, checked your tyres and had a nice chat. I do like the fact that the petrol prices are fixed nationwide every month so you’re not getting ripped off like in the US/UK. I’ve seen prices in the US vary by over $1 per gallon just a few miles apart.
@Gordon this is one of the reasons I’m rushing around seeing things now. At some point I feel I’ll lose my driving license due to poor eyesight, so need to get as many road trips as I can under my belt before I’m limited to group coach tours 🙁
Already don’t drive after dark if I can help it.
@Tracy Just do it, you won’t regret it. From my limited experience I would say forget Kruger, go to Victoria Falls (and the evening river cruise) and then Chobe. Chobe was so accessible, 10 mins to the park gates from the hotel, relatively short game drives (compared to Kruger) and the fauna are just there in front of you. The evening river cruises have loos on the boats too.
@Man of Kent – That’s funny, I was slowing down towards the end and you felt I was speeding up 🙂 If I planned it again there’s definitely places that I wouldnt spend 3-4 days rather than 1 night just because the accomodation was so beautiful and relaxing. Trouble is that you never know until you arrive at a property what the vibe is like.
- You must be logged in to reply to this topic.
Popular articles this week:
